Not Normal

Not Normal


Tom was a normal guy. Normal by pretty much anyone's standards. He had a secure job working as some kind of data analyst. You know one of those jobs where even after it’s explained to you, you still don’t really know what it is they do, but it sounded good when they explained it. Anyway, he was getting by month to month just fine. He lived alone with his pet cat which he got in his previous relationship. His home was nothing special, but it was his, he had a mortgage. Most of the house was beige, he got a couple of houseplants to add some colours but he was struggling to keep them alive. He was just under 6ft, not tall enough to be described as tall but not short enough to even be described as average. So yeah, Tom was a very normal guy.


One day Tom was sat at his desk typing in numbers, or words, or code or whatever it is a data analyst has to type in. And it clicked with him just how ordinary his life was. If someone would have come up to him that day and asked him to name something noteworthy he’s done in the 10 years since leaving school, he wouldn’t have had an answer. Infact he probably couldn’t name any single thing in his entire life. He hadn’t even misbehaved as a child.


Well he decided he was gonna change that, he was gonna do something bad. Problem was he wasn’t a bad guy, he didn’t want to be a bad guy. So he had an idea. He would break into his own house. 


Have you ever wondered how useful your neighbors might be, like. If someone tried to break in, would your neighbors notice, would they do anything about it? Well why not try breaking into your own house. Stick a hoody on, wait until it’s dark and pop out of the house. Do it loudly so the neighbors know you have gone out.

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